Relationship Advice - 3 Keys To Intimacy

Written by Johnnie S Laney on Tue, 5 May 2009

Total views: 6 :: Word Count: 386 :: 0 comments

• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 

Lots of relationship studies have been done on intimacy. Do couples experience more of it over time or less of it? Not surprisingly, the overwhelming majority of studies find that peoples experience of intimacy diminishes the longer the relationship.

This means that the longer you are in a relationship, the less intimacy you are likely to experience as a couple. Over a long period of time, you can end up feeling more like roommates.

Of course, it doesn't need to happen this way. There are actually many steps you can take to improve the experience of intimacy over time in your marriage. 3 of these steps are as follows:

Intimacy Factor One: Small talk. The more, the better! Surprisingly, studies demonstrate that the more small connective talk couples have, the greater the satisfaction they report in their relationships. And, the more small talk couples had, the less they fought about other issues. So talk about your day and your little observations and listen to your mate as they do also.

Step Two: Nonsexual physical contact. Look, intimacy leaves clues. How often you hug or touch your mate, how often you look them in the eye made a big difference in lovers reported feelings of intimacy or lack thereof. Aim to have six hugs or rubs a day with your mate. Touch them! And, look your mate right in the eye when talking. These simple things actually affect our experience of intimacy.

Intimacy Factor Three: Gratitude and appreciation. The more you each take some time to appreciate what you've got, the more intimacy you will experience and feel. It's normal to think of what's missing or what's wrong. Finding three things a day you appreciate about your life and your mate helps you to express more affection, which leads to more feelings of intimacy.

There are, of course, many other factors that impact our experience of intimacy over time in marriage. However, practicing just these three things each day can actually add a greater experience of affection and intimacy between you long term.

There is much more relationship intelligence that can help your relationship to thrive, not just survive. Studying and adding to your relationship skills by practicing intimacy can pay off for years.

About the Author

You can learn much more about this in the free course 7 Vital Relationship Insights You Never Learned In School at How To Have The Love You Want. Johnnie S Laney teaches emotional intelligence classes and you can get more here Loving Relationship Advice.

Comments

Add Comment